Tax Poetry

While nowhere near as good as my analysis of the California Budget crisis in alliterative verse, here’s a poem on taxes:

Tax his land, tax his wage,
Tax his bed in which he lays.
Tax his tractor, tax his mule,
Teach him taxes is the rule.

Tax his cow, tax his goat,
Tax his pants, tax his coat.
Tax his ties, tax his shirts,
Tax his work, tax his dirt.

Tax his chew, tax his smoke,
Teach him taxes are no joke.
Tax his car, tax his grass,
Tax the roads he must pass.

Tax his food, tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his sodas, tax his beers,
If he cries, tax his tears.

Tax his bills, tax his gas,
Tax his notes, tax his cash.
Tax him good and let him know
That after taxes, he has no dough.

If he hollers, tax him more,
Tax him until he’s good and sore.
Tax his coffin, tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he lays.

Put these words upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom!”
And when he’s gone, we won’t relax,
We’ll still be after the inheritance tax.

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5 Responses to “Tax Poetry”

  1. Natalie Says:

    Taxman by the Beatles springs to mind:

    Let me tell you how it will be,
    There’s one for you, nineteen for me,
    ‘Cos I’m the Taxman,
    Yeah, I’m the Taxman.
    Should five per cent appear too small,
    Be thankful I don’t take it all.
    ‘Cos I’m the Taxman,
    Yeah yeah, I’m the Taxman.

    (If you drive a car car), I’ll tax the street,
    (If you try to sit sit), I’ll tax your seat,
    (If you get too cold cold), I’ll tax the heat,
    (If you take a walk walk), I’ll tax your feet.
    Taxman.

    ‘Cos I’m the Taxman,
    Yeah, I’m the Taxman.
    Don’t ask me what I want it for
    (Ah Ah! Mister Wilson!)
    If you don’t want to pay some more
    (Ah Ah! Mister Heath!),
    ‘Cos I’m the Taxman,
    Yeeeah, I’m the Taxman.

    Now my advice for those who die, (Taxman!)
    Declare the pennies on your eyes, (Taxman!)
    ‘Cos I’m the Taxman,
    Yeah, I’m the Taxman.
    And you’re working for no-one but me,
    (Taxman).

  2. motion29 Says:

    There’s another song by the beatles that also springs to mind and will apply to Lawerence Springborg’s insessent desire to be the Taxman as described above. It’s called “I’m a LOSER”! LOL HAHAHAAHAHAHA

  3. motion29 Says:

  4. Riccardo Nobili Says:

    An interesting depiction of taxes.All are extremely true , whom would have thought that tax seemingly rhymes with everything we touch.

  5. ass raper Says:

    First off I want to say awesome blog! I had a quick question that I’d like to ask if you do not mind. I was interested to find out how you center yourself and clear your mind before writing. I’ve had difficulty clearing my thoughts
    in getting my ideas out there. I do enjoy writing however it just seems like the
    first 10 to 15 minutes are generally wasted simply just trying to figure out how to begin.
    Any suggestions or tips? Thank you!

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